A brave single guy ventures out to look for love in a really wrong place… The netherworld.
No one claims that dating these days is easy – some might even suggest that today’s social scene is just plain dead. So when the “live ones” get away from you at the gym or the club, you may have to start looking elsewhere to find that special someone. The hotties of the past may be out of your league, but hey, it’s not like they’re getting a lot of play these days…
PART 5 – STRIPPIN’ WITH SALOME
I knew the moment I met her that asking Salome out was a bad idea. I mean, don’t get me wrong -- she looked great in her veils when I picked her up to go to the Hard Rock Cafe (she wasn’t wearing all seven, either!) But I got the immediate impression that she was too flighty and immature for me.
And I was right.
She got in my car and immediately inserted a CD of club music into my player, then turned the volume up high. Before I knew it, she was hanging outside the window flashing her boobs -- “or showing her wares,” as she put it – at every guy in the slow lane (one was so distracted he swerved and hit a cow.)
Then she saw the bright neon invitation of a rundown strip club and wanted to stop. I really didn’t want to bring her into a sketchy place with a bunch of horny guys, but it was ladies’ night, so at least I didn’t have to pay for her cover charge. By the time my eyes adjusted in the dim light, she was already entered in the Amateur Night competition and doing her famous “Dance of the Seven Veils” onstage in front of 14 men who looked like wolves circling and salivating around a young deer that’s been wounded (I could be wrong, as I said, the lights were dim).
It was so dark I did not see Salome reaching for my hand, but the next thing I know, I was being dragged onstage and shoved into a folding chair. Salome then proceeded to bait the audience and see who would give her the best prize for her special performance. From what I could see, she already had enough dollar bills tucked into her chastity belt to buy her a few iPods. Upon closer inspection, I saw that the chastity belt (which looked more like a chastity thong) seemed to have been tampered with, which is never a good sign.
She won the contest, and the cash prize, and a Rolex from a guy named Harold. And I got the lapdance of my life, so I was happy. But it didn’t last. When we finally got to the Hard Rock, she just had to be the center of attention. Soon she was dancing and stripping and flirting again with every guy in the place. And then she grabbed a tambourine off the B-52’s display and start playing it wildly. When she ordered “head cheese,” I just couldn’t take anymore and told her I had an urgent matter to take care of at work.
Salome, of course, wanted to stay, which was fine by me. The last I saw her, she was tongue-kissing some no-neck bartender named John.
Next Time: Part 6 –Breakfast in Bed with Audrey Hepburn
AllStar is a writer/photographer currently based in South Florida. He is currently offering a special photo shoot discount to GG models. Send comments, suggestions, and photo shoot requests to AllStar @ godsgirls.com
(Previous parts of Dates With Dead Babes may be found in the archives.)
